My Life

fieryfruit:

fieryfruit:

you’ve really gotta hand it to short people

because we usually can’t reach it anyways

lilithkiss:

kiss it better

"I know you’re the boss and you have to compartmentalize everything but it’s not healthy."

I’m getting tired of losing our best and brightest to Hydra.

I’m getting tired of losing our best and brightest to Hydra.

He doesn’t talk to you like the others. It’s quite refreshing, actually.

In Class

thatcrazysidecharacter:

ninathebored:

we are talking about a Sherlock Holmes story we read

teacher: so how does the story start

Jakob: Watson sees a fully clothed Sherlock standing by the window

teacher: Well It’s a fine detail that you mentioned that Sherlock was wearing clothes.

me whispering to thatcrazysidecharacter: well at least we know that it’s not Johnlock

Yes it was something like that, but I was more thinking that we now know Jakob ships it ;)

prongsvssquid:

prongsvssquid:

Snow White twist where Snow White is played by a dark-skinned woman with snow white hair

  • another twist: the story focuses on beauty in the context of racial prejudice 
  • the stepmother is white and known as the ‘fairest of them all’ but then this girl with dark skin grows to be more beautiful than her and she doesn’t understand and she doesn’t like it and she is threatened by it
  • you can see where this is going

itsstuckyinmyhead:

Tumblr Loves Halloween 

ignitionremix:

I’ve never broken a bone which just seems too suspicious to me I probably don’t have any bones

nintendofunclub:

c0caino:

Take your age and add 5 to it. That is your age in 5 years.

image

blondeloli:

daddysriotgrrrl:

blondeloli:

i can finally fulfill my dream of having tons of dicks in my mouth!

"what do you mean you’re not impressed by the hundreds of cocks i can take in my mouth at once?" 

*at the dentist’s office*
"Why do you have so many cavities?"
"i ate too many dicks :("

blondeloli:

daddysriotgrrrl:

blondeloli:

i can finally fulfill my dream of having tons of dicks in my mouth!

"what do you mean you’re not impressed by the hundreds of cocks i can take in my mouth at once?" 

*at the dentist’s office*

"Why do you have so many cavities?"

"i ate too many dicks :("

just-gypsy-caroline:

dangergays:

My boyfriend broke up with me and my 80 year old, 5 foot tall, Indian grandmother told me that “there are lots of men…”

I thought she was then going to say “…in the sea” but she said “…they’re like flies” and made a disgusted face.

She hates flies.

I like the sound of your grandmother.